Monday, January 18, 2010

In my Monologue

Inspired by this SNL monologue from Taylor Swift, (Seriously, people, if you have four minutes to spare, you should watch it.  Even if you have only a smidge of pop culture love in your soul, it's worth it.)  and horrified by the fact that I have not blogged in nearly a month, I have decided to write about all the things this post is NOT about.
*  I'm not going to post about the tremendous amount of vomit my smallest child has produced over the last three weeks.  This is for two reasons.  #1)  It wouldn't be fair to brag about her prodigious ability to puke when she has also been spewing amazingly in other ways, if you know what I mean.  and #2)  My dad and my husband, bless their teasing hearts, love to take any possible opportunity to share all the synonyms they know for "throw up" and in my weakened, I've-been-cleaning-up-barf-for-a-million-years condition, I just couldn't handle it.
*  This post is not about the wonderful time we had in Utah over Christmas break.  I won't talk about all the amazing fun we had with my entire family (EVERYONE made it) at the Fish Lake cabin, sledding and ice fishing and eating, eating, eating for a week.  I also won't mention that it was wonderful to stay with John's family for a few days after that, seeing Chris and Krista and their darling kids.
*  This post is certainly not a 2009 "wrap-up", hitting our year's highlights and favorites.  I know I've done that every year, and I mean to do it again, but I'm just not doing it now.
*  I don't want to write this post about how little Olivia, with all her rule-following self, gave herself a haircut BEFORE asking politely if she was allowed to cut her own hair.  That was also, obviously, before she received the answer of a definite "No" from her mother.  I won't be posting pictures here of the salvage job that Kelly did, repairing Olivia's "trim," but if I were to post pictures, you would see that her poor decision has led to an unfairly cute little bob.  I don't think she's learned her lesson.
*  I'm not posting about "Crazy Hat Day" that we attended at Chik-Fil-A today, with homemade hats on our head and free chicken sandwiches in our stomachs.  It was fun to meet our friends there and delicious to have such a treat, but I'm not writing about it.
*  This post is also not to share one of my other sweet Taylor Swift finds, "Firelight."  If I were to write about it, I would mention that I am not a "Twilight" fan, having read only the first book and not having seen any of the movies, but I still think I would find it funny if I was.  I would also write that you would be surprised how quotable this piece of dialogue from the segment is:
Phillip:  "Say it.  Out Loud."
Stella [biting her lip]:  Frankenstein.
It really can find its way into nearly every snatch of conversation. 
*  And even though it seems like it, this post is actually not an Ode to Hulu.  That would be a great post, but that's just not what this post is about.

9 comments:

Irish Cream said...

If I were to leave a comment, and I'm not, then I would not write about how hilarious Taylor Swift was. Nor would I mention in my comment how I am totally out of the pop culture and didn't get many of her references. And since I'm not leaving a comment, I should probably not mention, either, that Firelight was a crack-up, too. But this is my comment- la, la la, la. And if this is my comment, I might mention how incredibly awesome Hulu is, but I won't talk about how sad it is that they tease you by getting you hooked on a show and then half the episodes disappear from their site. Nor would I mention how much I like Dresden Files and Firefly (Go Joss Whedon), because that would not be in my comment. La, la la, la.

Kate said...

You're hilarious. Loved this post.

Mags said...

i love your posts. thank-you for not ignoring my sanity.

Lyle said...

I won't say anything about "ralphing" or "blowing chunks."

Renae said...

The Frankenstein segment is hilarious. Please do post a picture of Olivia's hair. I haven't learned my lesson to this day! I've been chopping and must stop. Glad you had a great vacation with your families, it really makes a holiday!

Annie said...

I'm glad this post revolves around taylor swift and bella blowing chunks. two of my favorite things in the whole world. in fact, i like the latter so much that i kept on my pants all night long new years eve.

Sara said...

Poor Bella.

Awesome post.

Jeff and Larissa said...

Ohhhh, that Firelight is just too good. Love it!

回憶 said...
This comment has been removed by a blog administrator.