(Warning: I'm talking about grossness today. Weak stomachs should move along to the next blog.)
Let me preface this post with saying I am the oldest of eight children, in a family with six boys. (Most of you already know this.) I came into motherhood as no stranger to gross. I used to believe that toilets just naturally yellowed under the lid and around the base, but even when I realized that the "natural yellowing" was really just the natural result of having at least one brother who was new to the potty training thing, I cleaned it up with only minor grumbling. (Only minor grumbling about the fact that it was pee. MAJOR grumbling about the fact that I was cleaning period.)
My baby brother had a terrible habit of puking almost as soon as he was put to bed on the nights when my mother was away. I have vivid resentful memories of cleaning these messes up. (My mom should rightfully point out that although did wipe up the floor, clean the baby, and put fresh sheets and pajamas on, my idea of cleaning the old bedding meant dumping it in the laundry room--where she would have to deal with it the next day.)
So, all this being said, I shouldn't have been surprised with all the little yucky things that come along with being a mom. I could talk about the hundreds of thousands of diaper changes. Or changing my clothes five times before going out in public because of the spit-up that inevitably splatters a clean shirt. (The Mother's Corollary to Murphy's Law?)
But what I've recently taken notice of are all those times where I let a puddle-jumping child wipe their hands on my jeans because they are suddenly horrified by the dirt. Or how I'll actually let them spit something they have chewed and deemed disgusting into my hand rather than let it dribble down their shirt. Or how I wipe yucky noses with my own sock (my sock is less visible than any other piece of clothing), when I don't have a tissue on hand. I think I was once a relatively normal human being, and I wonder what my 20-year old self would say if she could see me now. Probably just "Gross."